Where’s my blanket fort? Handling overwhelm with grace

When I say blanket fort, what do you think of? I think back to the days of my childhood where I spent hours erecting the perfect blanket fort, with chairs lined up perfectly to hold the appropriately matching colored blankets, and the tranquil interior filled with blankets, fluffy pillows, my Nancy Drew books, Etch-a-Sketch, graham crackers, the family cat and everyone with cooties was banned.

Doesn’t that sound lovely … especially during times of feeling overwhelmed??

I often get myself into situations where I feel overwhelmed. It’s totally my doing because I tend to take on way too much (all for the greater good of helping people and pets as I rationalize my 12+ hour work days, often 7 days a week). So here’s what I’ve done lately that made me want to retreat to my childhood fort:

  • I made a huge life move from 11 years in Virginia back home to Michigan (with all of the stress of buying a house, selling a house, packing, moving, getting unpacked and set up, while keeping the kitties calm);
  • Two days after the move I felt strongly that I needed to sign up for Marie Forleo’s intensive B-School before registration closed, so I dove in to her 8-week course (which I am loving, but the timing was a bit overwhelming);
  • Three weeks after the move I signed up for a 6-week Chemistry of Essential Oils class (which I also love);
  • I’ve attended two in-person essential oil trainings (with more on the horizon) which were amazing;
  • I’ve held 5 workshops and webinars;
  • I’ve maintained my animal protection, including travel, work while balancing the set up of Manifested Harmony;
  • I have several new classes that I really want to develop;
  • I’m enjoying reconnecting with my Michigan tribe and getting back into ballroom dancing;
  • And the list goes on and on.

While there is some work that I’m not entirely enamored with these days, everything else I absolutely adore and love which is why I keep piling it on! I am ravenous when it comes to learning and sharing what I’ve learned. But two weeks ago, I hit the blanket fort wall. I looked at my chalk wall board in my office and thought holy crap, how am I going to get through all of this?

Have you been there? I think you have. And what is our natural instinct? We start to shut down and our productivity comes to a grinding halt which makes us feel even worse. And then when we’re not checking off our to-do list because we’re overwhelmed, we then feel even more overwhelmed. Right? #viciouscycle

So what did I do? I crafted my adult version of the blanket fort which contains sparkly fairy lights, my survival kit of Young Living Essential Oils (high frequency oils like Neroli, Rose, Sacred Mountain, Stress Away), crystals (my favorite Brandberg, some Prehnite, and lots of grounding crystals like Black Tourmaline), an inspiring book, my 3 cats weaving in and out, and wine (I put oils in the wine, so that makes it healthy, right?)! And when I come out for a small break, I only watch The Hallmark Channel and The Love Boat which I recently found on Pop TV! Squuuuueeee!!!!!! Why those shows? They are all heart-felt shows/movies that leave you feeling good. I’ve also taken to building fairy houses (check out my creation below)! Taking some ME time – to do nothing that will save the world – is just what I need to re-energize.

Fairy houseHere’s the thing about getting overwhelmed: acknowledge it, let yourself have some downtime, do things that bring you joy, but don’t wallow too long otherwise it’s difficult to crawl back into productivity. Then just add one thing to your list for the day and overhwleovermake sure you get that done. Then the next day, add one more task. By the end of the week you’ve checked off 7 tasks and 30 by the end of the month! And most of all, give yourself permission to be gentle on yourself. Being gentle does not mean being lazy and shirking responsibilities; it means giving yourself time each day to just do something nurturing and kind for yourself.

Let’s chat about this … post me a comment of the 3 things that you do to help you cope with overwhelm and we can all learn better ways to take care of ourselves!

About Allie Phillips:

Me Aug 2014Allie is a unique combination of self-empowerment coach (Certified Law of Attraction Counselor and Life Coach), energy therapist (Usui Reiki Master-Teacher, Integrated Energy Therapy Master-Instructor, and Advanced Crystal Master), award-winning book author, attorney and nationally-recognized animal advocate. Whether it’s wanting more freedom, creativity, loving relationships, financial security, wellbeing, relaxation, or adjusting to the energy of our new world … she looks at each person and animal holistically and creates a well-being plan. She holistically combines these methods to help people gain control of their lives and to help animals live with comfort in our hectic world. It worked for her and will work for you!  She particularly loves helping our animal companions because for those of us who have them grace our worlds, they are our soul mates.
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Open that throat chakra and speak your truth

Speak the truthHow many times have you stopped short of saying what you really want to say? Maybe you read something interesting or even controversial and you want to tell others. Maybe you have studied something (like energy healing, Law of Attraction, essential oils) and want to share what you learned. Maybe you see an animal who needs help. Maybe you have a belief or testimonial about how something has worked for you. But then you stopped short and did not share, did not speak. The #1 culprit for why we lock up our throat chakra and don’t speak our truth is because we want to be liked/loved/accepted and we’re afraid that speaking up with cause friction, controversy, an argument, or being told no. Is this ringing true for you?

Yesterday, I posted something on my Facebook page written by someone else about why she thinks Young Living is the best essential oil company out there. The article resonated with me so I wanted to give her some support. The author is a chemist and wrote from a scientific perspective (which the geek in me loves). I reposted it on my Facebook page with added commentary about how I tossed out over 30 bottles of oils from other companies because if you cannot ingest the oil, apply it directly to your skin, or use it with animals, then why in the #&$$ would you inhale it (directly or diffusing) which goes directly to your brain and into your blood stream? (This is the sort of cool stuff I’m learning in a Chemistry for Essential Oils class, taught by a chemist, and taking a lot of workshops with medical doctors). A couple of people took issue with the post.

I’m an attorney who has spent the legal-side of her entire career either in front a jury prosecuting criminals or in front of classes teaching (and sometimes to difficult audiences). I have no problem speaking my truth, sharing what I know and believe, and I intentionally tackle the topics that others shy away from. But I see so many people swallowing their words (both in person and online) because they don’t want a problem.

I am blessed in that I’ve not had any negative feedback on social media until that post yesterday. And you know what? I responded back to the posters. I wanted to acknowledge them for speaking their truth (even though it differs from what I know), to share what I know, and let them know that it’s ok to agree to disagree.

So here’s what I want to share with you so that you will begin to share and speak your truth:

  • You are entitled to your opinion. Period. No one lives in your brain, has your experiences or education other than you. Own it, don’t hide it. If you hide it, your throat chakra will get all yucky and clogged (imagine your sink drain full of hair and crap) and then you’ll have to work long and hard with someone like me to open it up (which, for those who I work with, it often involves a really loud screaming rant outdoors when no one is around).
  • If someone does not like what you’re saying, they have the free will to walk away. That does not mean that they disapprove of you; they just have a different opinion. Now if they walk away and disapprove of you, good riddance sweet pea, right? And remember that you have the right to walk away too. Own your space.
  • If someone disagrees with you, go ahead and have a healthy and respectful discussion. I’m an attorney and I do not debate anyone. I give them my opinion (usually backed up with evidence) and they give me their opinion and then it’s done. It’s ok to end it with “it’s ok if we disagree.” With 7 billion people on this glorious planet, we’re not all going to agree. Discuss and move on, but don’t let it stop you from discussing it in the future with others.
  • If someone tries to bully you into their opinion, stop, turn around and walk away. No one has the right to bully you, and likewise you should not bully someone with your opinion. Intellectual bullies in particular drive me bananas because they get mean in pursuing their point which overwhelming has no truth or support to it (hence, why they are a bully).
  • Now a word about opinions online: If you post something online and it results in an onslaught of negative posts, here’s what I recommend:
    • Read what each person says (even if inside you’re thinking I’m not going to agree with them). Read it because you may learn something new, you may be able to give an alternate explanation to them, and then acknowledge to them that you read it. Most people simply want to be heard and acknowledging can significantly reduce tension.
    • If the person continues to rant, bad mouth or get hostile, remember that you own that page (whether it’s a personal or professional social media page, website, newsletter, etc.). You wouldn’t let someone come into your home and do that to you, right? Your online space is your online home. So if someone continues and wants to debate (see prior recommendation on no debates), then consider removing them from your page. I have no problem banning and deleting but I use that as a final you-went-too-far-in-my-online-home-and-now-I’m-getting-a-restraining-order tactic.

CelestiteNow what do you do if you’ve been swallowing your truth? Here’s a few simple things that you can do at home and have fun too:

  • Go outside and scream what you really want to say! This works best when no one else is around (no need for the neighbor to call 911 on you). This gets the throat chakra blasted open. If you’re a runner or can go to the woods or water, go for it and scream!!
  • Then you’ll want to infuse the throat chakra with some gentler energy. Try these:
    • Crystals: Angelite, Blue lace agate, Celestite are my favorites for having an open throat chakra but speaking your truth compassionately and not like a bull dozer. Just lay down and place the crystal on your throat for 10 minutes a day until you notice a change.
    • White angelica1Young Living oils: Chamomile (German and Roman), Frankincense, Harmony, and White Angelica. Smell them, diffuse them in a cold diffuser or apply a drop on your throat (use a carrier oil if you worry about sensitivity).
    • Wear the color blue around your throat area (scarf, etc.) because blue is the color of the throat chakra.
    • Sing! This is especially effective when you’re alone in your car jamming to 80’s music.

There are a lot of opinions out there that are conveyed in a variety of ways (in anger, to educate, etc.). Remember that when you speak your truth, do so compassionately and with the full intention of helping others.

I would love to hear your experiences with speaking your truth or holding in your truth. Post a comment and let’s chat!

About Allie Phillips:

Me Aug 2014Allie is a unique combination of self-empowerment coach (Certified Law of Attraction Counselor and Life Coach), energy therapist (Usui Reiki Master-Teacher, Integrated Energy Therapy Master-Instructor, and Advanced Crystal Master), award-winning book author, attorney and nationally-recognized animal advocate. Whether it’s wanting more freedom, creativity, loving relationships, financial security, wellbeing, relaxation, or adjusting to the energy of our new world … she looks at each person and animal holistically and creates a well-being plan. She holistically combines these methods to help people gain control of their lives and to help animals live with comfort in our hectic world. It worked for her and will work for you!  She particularly loves helping our animal companions because for those of us who have them grace our worlds, they are our soul mates.
YL 1414338
Join in on the fun!

google-plusInstagram-logo-transparent-png-i11

I have added more stuff to my Members Only page!! Click here for instant access to essential oil videos, a “New Energy Business & Abundance Grid” booklet, free articles, and  more!