Have you ever been deleted from someone’s life without a conversation or even a goodbye? I have and it is really disturbing, right? It is baffling when someone simply walks away and deletes you without the courtesy of a conversation (whether in person or online). With the growth of social media, it is beautiful to connect across the globe with friends from the past and to make new friends. But connecting online can be superficial and it sets up a culture that when you are upset or uninterested in maintaining a connection, you simply unfriend and delete the person. I am seeing this happening more and more and it conflicts with the new energy of more compassion and connections.
I’m going to blunt to these deletors … it’s cowardly, it’s low vibrational energy, it’s immature, and we don’t want to share that energy with you. But it is hurtful when it happens.
So what’s a sensitive soul to do when you have been deleted? Here are some tried and true techniques that have helped:
- Have a conversation with yourself that the other person’s dismissive conduct really has nothing to do with you. If it did, they would not hesitate to have a conversation of throwing blame on you if you really did something wrong. When someone just leaves without notice or conversation, it is wholly about them. And the one thing in life that you cannot control is other people.
- Recognize that if the person was a close friend, family member or romantic partner, that you likely had a soul contract with them to learn something (and they also had something to learn). Spend quiet time reflecting on what you were supposed to learn and then LEARN IT! Otherwise you will attract another similar energy and have to learn the lesson again and again and again. When you learn the lesson, the person will disappear because the contract is complete.
- Be grateful that the person came into your life to teach you a lesson and that you learned it and can move on. Thank them in person or write them a letter (and not send it) for the lesson and wish them well. From a true place of genuineness, send them love for their own healing and you will find that forgiveness comes faster.
- Have a closure ceremony: Light candles, play beautiful music, diffuse essential oils, thank them and say goodbye. Even set the thank you letter on fire outdoors and send it to source energy.
- Then you need to support yourself through the healing. Let yourself cry, grieve and go through the process. Don’t block it because you will just embed the hurtful energy deeper into your cells. These supportive tools can really help:
- Essential oils: These are my favorite Young Living oils for support: Forgiveness, Highest Potential, Joy, Release, Valor and White Angelica.
- Crystals: Lots and lots of pink and green crystals for heart chakra support. Rose Quartz, Green Aventurine, Kunzite, Prehnite are my favs.
- Energy healing: Go for a session or two to get the hurtful energy moving out. Self healing is good, but letting someone else nurture you is even better.
- Epsom salt baths with essential oils every day until you feel better. Epsom salts help to remove toxins and essential oils will keep your vibration high.
- Oracle cards: Work with your favorite deck to focus not on the past, but on the present and future. You will feel better with that focus.
- Vision boards: Change up your vision board to focus on the new relationship(s) you will attract and stay focused!
There will always be people out there who take the easy way out of a situation and simply delete you without the courtesy of a conversation. Even though it will hurt, just know that their conduct has nothing to do with you and you have tools available to help you quickly recover and attract in people who will nurture and love you.
About Allie Phillips: